A Nightmare
by Veridissima
Summary: It was a normal day on Winterfell, until Ned couldn't find Jon... Cat/Ned and Ned and the kids (especially Jon). It's pre-series, just after the Greyjoy Rebellion


_**Eddard "Ned" Stark**_

The light coming from the window woke up Ned, he felt something pressing against his chest – light kisses. Since he came back, Cat would kiss and trace his new scars.

"Good morning." He said smiling at her while his fingers played with her hair. Ned was still getting used of waking up next to his wife everyday, when for months he had been sharing a tent with his men.

"Morning, love. Sleep well?"

"Yes. You, my lady?"

"Never better." She kissed his lips and climbed on top of him, straddling him and tracing his scars, this time not only the new ones but also the old ones – like his body as a path she had walked hundred times.

He kept his right hand on her hair, massaging her scalp and making her moan; his left hand travelled to the laces of her nightshift, when he finally got them unlaced and his hand could touch her flesh, they heard a cry from the nursery, Cat groaned, burying her face in Ned's shoulder.

"She must be hungry. I'll get her." Ned said, getting out of her bed and kissing her lips for the last time, and went to pick up Arya from her cradle, he tried to calm her but she didn't quieted.

"I think she's just hungry, my love. Bring her here." He passed his little girl to Catelyn's arms and looked at her while she fed her.

"You both look beautiful." Catelyn blushed and her cheeks matched the colour of her hair. He looked at her for few minutes and then decided to get dress – they still kept two chambers like it was custom but Ned had a habit of leaving some of his clothes in her chambers all the time.

"I'm going to check on the rest of the kids and see if they are ready for breakfast." She just smiled and nodded; he looked at his wife and baby for the last time and left her bedchamber.

He looked in both Jon and Robb's bedchambers and they were both empty, the boys were both early risers, and most days they played outside before breakfast. So he went to his oldest daughter's bedchamber, she was being dressed with the help of a maid.

"Father." Sansa yelled.

"Good morning."

"M'lord." The maid greeted Ned.

"Thank you. But I can take it from here." The maid left the room, and Ned went to his girl.

"Did you sleep well, sweetie?"

"Yes, papa." She had already been dressed in a simple blue dress, so he sat his daughter on his knees and tried to do her hair just like Cat had taught him, she giggled and then sang him a song that he knew so well, Catelyn had sung it most nights to each one of their children. When he finally finished braiding her hair the best he could, he took her hand and led her to the Great Hall.

When they entered, Catelyn was already at the table with Arya in her arms – Ned thanked the Gods that Arya was quiet this time – Sansa forgetting her manners ran to her mother yelling _Papa did my hair_,Catelyn sent him a smileas he sat next to her, taking her hand under the table.

After a few moments, Robb entered running and sat at the table, he was prepared to put three small cakes on his plate.

"Robb Stark, put those back. You can eat _one_ after you eat your fruit and bread."

"Mother…" He groaned.

"Robb…" Against his will he putted the cakes back, but Ned noticed his son taking one to his pocket – Ned didn't say anything.

Ned couldn't help but notice that Jon was missing, he had been waiting for him to show up, first he was late but now they were finishing breakfast and Jon hadn't showed up yet.

"Robb." Ned called out while the boy was leaving the table.

"Yes, father."

"Have you seen your brother?" Ned felt Catelyn tensing next to him.

"Jon was already out of the bed when I woke up."

"Wasn't he on the training yard?"

"No." Robb answered before running off and Ned was starting to get worried.

After he finished eating, he retired to his solar, but Ned couldn't concentrate on anything besides Jon, _where could he be? _

He ended up leaving the solar – he wasn't getting any work done. He found Robb training with Ser Rodrik Cassel but Jon was still not there.

"Sorry to interrupt. But have either of you seen Jon?"

"No, my lord." Ser Rodrik said while Robb only shook his head.

"Ser, do you mind if I take Robb for awhile?"

"No, of course not. My lord." He said bowing to Ned and leaving the yard. Ned kneeled so he could be at the same eye sight that Robb and asked.

"Can you do me a big favour?"

"Of course, father."

"You know your brother's favourite hiding places, right?" Robb nodded. "I need you to go look for him there. I'm not mad; I just really need to find him." Robb ran and went looking for his brother. Ned didn't move, he stayed there waiting for Robb to come back and _to_ _please bring Jon,_ he prayed to the Old Gods. _I promised her, I lied to everyone to protect him, I love him. Just please let him be okay._

A few moments later, Robb ran back to Ned and yelled.

"I couldn't find him, father."

"Okay, go back inside and warn Maester Luwin, he'll know what to do."

"Where are you going to go, father?"

"I'm going to go look for Jon." Robb ran back inside the keep, while Ned turned to the people around him and asked. "Please someone bring me the fastest horse." He pointed to five member of his household guard and said. "Gather your horses, you're coming with me."

Ned and five more men rode through the Godswood, calling by his son's (_nephew's_) name. When they fought the three knights of the Kingsguard, he hadn't been this scared, he didn't know how to deal with losing Jon, _would I mourn him alone? How would I tell Robb or Sansa? How could I live knowing I broke the last thing I promised Lyanna?_

"JON! JON!" He kept riding quicker and quicker, his screams got more desperate… _I can't loose him, I can't loose my son… _And he wondered when did Jon became his son and stopped being his nephew? "JON! JON! JON!"

And then he heard a voice yelling.

"My lord! My lord!" He turned and found Jory Cassel; his father rode with him and died for the little boy they were looking for. _I need to find him_. "My lord, they found him. He was safe, in the castle, all this time."

"Thank you, Jory." He turned back and rode full speed, Jory by his side. "Is he really safe?"

"Yes, my lord. Jon is safe." His horse started riding faster and faster, when he reached the yard, Robb had already joined Ser Rodrik and continued his training. But Maester Luwin was by the entrance to the Great Keep.

"Maester Luwin…"

"He's in your chamber, my lord."

"My chamber?!"

"Yes. I let him sleep, my lord. I hope that was the right thing to do."

"Of course." _My chamber… Why would he be there?_ He walked to his chamber, taking two steps at a time, he knocked on the door but he got no response, so he entered his own chamber quietly and found Jon sleeping… looking so small in Ned's bed, huddled in a big fur that Ned normally kept in the end of his bed. When he got closer he could see that Jon had dried tears below his eyes and was hugging his wooden wolf (he hadn't slept with it for moons, he stopped even before Ned went to war) _Why was he holding it so close, now? Why was he crying? Was he scared?_

Jon looked like he hadn't slept much during the night, so Ned decided to let him sleep, climbing behind him, Jon immediately rested his head against Ned's chest and Ned ended up falling asleep too, listening to his son's small breaths… to his nephew's small breaths… and Ned knew he kept making that mistake, but it didn't matter anymore – Jon would always be more of his son than his nephew.

The sun was already high up in the sky, when Ned heard Jon whimpering next to him and saw fresh tears on his face.

"Jon, I'm here. It's okay, you're safe."

"Please, don't hurt me."

"Jon…" Ned said trying to wake up the scared boy. "Jon…" The boy started to open his eyes, looking closely to Ned – like he was trying to make sure he was alive. "Hey, Jon." Ned said, putting some Jon's hair behind his ear.

"Father!" Jon exclaimed, hugging Ned with his full strength, Ned kept his arms around him and asked.

"What happened, Jon? Why were you here? And, most important, why are you crying?"

"I had a nightmare, father. And, I promise, I tried to fell asleep again – I thought I'm old enough I can sleep alone. But I just couldn't, father…" Jon tried to clean the tears from his eyes. "I came looking for you, but you weren't here. I tried to stay awake and wait for you, but, I guess, I fell asleep."

"Why didn't you…" _Oh… Gods… He couldn't…_ Ned remembered other times Robb and Sansa would come knocking on Cat's bedchamber, climbing in bed with them. But Jon… Jon had stayed the entire night waiting for someone that wouldn't come… _Had this happened before? Does he leave Jon alone – scared – because he loves his wife and he doesn't want to leave her side?_ "Had this ever happened before?"

"What?"

"Coming here and not being able to find me." _He's so young; he doesn't understand why I hadn't been here. Can the Gods be cruel enough to keep asking me to choose between my lady wife – the woman I love – and a boy I love as my own?_

"No. I don't usually get this scared. And if I did… sometimes I would go and sleep with Robb." Jon said looking down. "But Theon mocked us the last time Robb was scared and came to my room." The Greyjoy boy, Theon, was still quiet and nervous around Ned, but it seemed his sons liked him, especially Robb. Of course, they wouldn't want to do something that Theon thought it was for babies.

"Can you tell me, what was the nightmare about?" Ned asked in a soft voice, Jon nodded and began.

"You died…" Ned's heart broke hearing Jon say that. "And then…" Ned squeezed his son's arms and told him to continue. "And then they made me leave Winterfell, I was alone in the forest, really alone, and that the Others came with giants and wildings, they wanted to eat me." Jon looked so scared, and for an instant Ned remembered Lyanna climbing on his bed when they had been young with nightmares caused by Old Nan's stories. He was brought to reality when Jon asked. "If you had died, what would have happened to me?" _What?! Robb, Sansa and Arya had Cat; Jon had me… I don't know_

"Firstly, maybe you should stop asking Old Nan for scaring stories. There are no giants or Others, and the wildings are safely beyond the wall. Secondly, do you think they would throw you in the forest? Nobody would do that to you."

"Are you sure?!" He looked so scared, looking at him with his grey's eyes. _Was Cat who threw him in the forest in his dreams? She would never do that to him, I don't know what she would do, but she wouldn't hurt an innocent kid._

"I promise… Nobody is going to throw you into the forest." Jon hugged Ned tightly and Ned asked. "You said _they_ threw in the forest. Who are _they_?" Jon looked down and whispered.

"The boys from the village and… Lady Catelyn." He said the name of his lady wife so quietly.

"Lady Catelyn…"

"Why doesn't she like me, father? I understand why, but I don't make noise and don't run in the keep, I always let Robb win when she's watching, and I help Sansa and Robb. I even tried to pick up flowers." _It's not your fault, it's mine… all mine. I lied and hurt her…_

"Because… Because it's hard for her…" Jon didn't ask anything more, he just nodded. And stayed there lying next to Ned. "Jon, I think it's time for the midday meal. So what do you think we go join the others, I bet Robb is dying to see you." Jon agreed and got out of bed, leaving Ned to go after him.

That afternoon Ned talked to Maester Luwin, and in case of his death, Jon would be fostered in Greywater Watch with Howard Reed. And for that night and the nights that followed Ned slept on his own bedchamber, trying to think of a way where he would be able to take care of two of the most important people in his life...

* * *

_I hope you liked it._

_And as you know, I'm not GRRM, so these characters and places don't belong to me._

_Sorry for any mistakes and typos, I'm not a native English speaker._


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